25 Better Insults For Kim Jong-Un To Use On Donald Trump

Last week, North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un got into yet another war of words with the man he’s trying to goad into starting an actual war. Un called U.S. President Donald Trump a “dotard” and a “warmonger” and President Trump responded with his own sarcastic tweet in which he backhandedly called Un “short and fat.” Trump’s tweet is below, in case you needed an excuse to lose a few brain cells reading abject stupidity.

Donald J. Trump on Twitter

Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me “old,” when I would NEVER call him “short and fat?” Oh well, I try so hard to be his friend – and maybe someday that will happen!

Now, look, I’m not one to take any spoiled, unfit, unworthy, entitled douchebag tyrant’s side over another’s. I mean, I frankly think in the battle between Donald Trump and Kim Jong-Un you’re supposed to root for violent diarrhea to befall both gladiators. But that being said, Donald Trump is such a contemptible piece of shit, and his supporters are such delusional, pants-shitting lunatics about turning a blind eye to gross incompetence and dangerous allergy to the truth, that it makes me just want to reach out to Un and hand him this list of insults, which I think are much more creative and better than basically calling the Orange Creamsicle of Assholeness “old.”

25 Better Insults For Kim Jong-Un To Use On Donald Trump
  1. Putin’s Pusillanimous Puppet
  2. The Michele Bachmann of Sarah Palins
  3. Captain Covfefe
  4. The Full-Blown AIDS of Presidents
  5. Mr. I Couldn’t Even Carry My Home State
  6. Fake News Fuckhead
  7. An Alleged Billionaire
  8. B-Team George W. Bush
  9. President Stupid-ham Stinkin’
  10. President Piss Party
  11. Apricot Pol Pot
  12. Tangerine Twat-waffle
  13. A mendacious, misanthropic miscreant…that wants to fuck his daughter.
  14. A trust fund racist…that regularly misuses “their, they’re, and there” in tweets.
  15. A Twitter-bound twit.
  16. The least-popularly elected POTUS of all time. (Bonus points for being true)
  17. Sausage Arteries McGee
  18. Mike Pence’s Placeholder
  19. A Less Likable Bag of Diarrhea Dipped in Orange Julius
  20. Sean Hannity’s Masturbatory Material
  21. The Older, Less Korean Me
  22. Tweetle Dumb
  23. That fuckwit from reality-TV.
  24. Darth Dumbass
  25. Donald J. Trump

Got any more to add? Let us know in the comments!



About James Schlarmann 1464 Articles
Comedian, writer, founding contributor of The Political Garbage Chute, holder of zero world records or lifetime achievement awards.
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