Don Trump’s Against Gutting The Congressional Ethics Watchdog Now? Yeah, Bullshit.

No. No, and hell no. I’m pretty sure Trump was good with House Republicans when he thought they were purging “ethnics.”

We will not be giving Donald “Grab ‘Em By The Pussy” Trump credit for thwarting an effort by House Republicans to gut an independent congressional oversight group. He was late to the party, made a case against it that was actually just a case against the timing of the Republicans’ actions, and he only said anything because literally millions of other Americans had raised red flags. Sure, I’ll give the Colostomy Bag-Elect credit for “hearing” the people and joining the chorus, but it’s the people, not the opportunistic kleptocrat, who deserve credit for this victory.

In case you missed it, the House Republicans made huge headlines when they decided they’d use their first vote in the Trump Era (he takes office a couple weeks after the newly elected Congress does) to gut a watchdog agency that was created specifically to investigate congressional corruption. Our own Renee Webb did a stellar write-up on their bullshit, below.

Men with No Ethics Vote to Get Rid of Ethics Oversight

House Republicans Drop Efforts To Gut Ethics Watchdog After Onslaught Of Criticism

House Republicans dropped their plans to gut the Office of Congressional Ethics after receiving criticism from lawmakers, watchdog groups and President-elect Donald Trump. Republicans decided to scrap an amendment by Rep. Bob Goodlatte (R-Va.) during an emergency conference meeting on Tuesday. This is developing. Check back for more.

This news broke yesterday, and the Internet was abuzz almost immediately. So why, if he’s really a man of the people, did it take Mr. Trump so damn long to chime in? Only he can answer that question, but in the interest of fairness to the piss-haired miscreant, he did do the right thing and (sorta) chastise Paul Ryan et. all for their idiocy.

If the timing of Trump’s tweets weren’t suspicious, the actual wording of them sure as hell still would be. The shorter version of Trump’s already short missive on the subject of Republicans blatantly trying to make it easier to corrupt themselves is something really simple.

“I like this, but I wish they’d do it later so that I don’t also look guilty.”

I can promise you that Trump’s motivation for tweeting at all about the subject was that he could tell he was going to get lit about it in the press. And he got that impression because, well, the press did its fucking job and covered the Republican effort truthfully. This touched off a firestorm of anger among the people, and within minutes of the story breaking, people were livid and tweeting their congressmen.

Not being a conspiracy theorist, I’m just tossing this out there having already seen what a sham Trump is, but what if the GOP never had any intention of actually gutting the watchdog group? What if this was all a bit of elaborate political theater designed like a head fake in basketball? The Republicans telegraph some insanely stupid and corrupt bullshit that Trump actually wants, but he gets to then come in and feign indignation and “bully” them into dropping their attempts to gut the watchdog.

Again, not saying that’s what happened here, but there is no way on God’s Green Earth that Genghis Con would have stepped in had the throng of angry rants not been spewed his way. I’m choosing to believe, actually, that the cynical political theater theory of mine isn’t true, and instead it’s the fact that people didn’t sit back and take it that forced Trump to say something at all. This is, in my view, a perfect case study in how the 75 million people who voted against Trump can make their voices heard and hopefully stymie the bastard — just speaking up.

In fact, I choose to believe that because of Trump’s own words. When he says “unfair as it may be” he’s signaling that he has disdain for the watchdog group himself. All Trump’s tweets truly communicate is that House Republicans should wait a few weeks or months before trying this shit again, that’s it. Trump’s not wrong — tax reform, healthcare, and many other things really are “of far greater importance” than making it harder for people to hold corrupt congressmen accountable, but I will go to my grave believing this isn’t a pair of tweets Trump wanted to send before divining that it’d be better for him politically to do so.

Which, I guess, should also give progressives and/or just anyone who sees what an orange turd bucket Trump is some hope as well. Maybe Trump will care more about his approval ratings than we’d initially thought, and putting pressure on him like any other politician can get him to act like a human. I’m certainly not suggesting we hang our hats on or hold our breaths over this wishful thinking. I’m just trying to find any silver linings with the Trump Era as I possibly can.

The bottom line? Trump isn’t against gutting the congressional watchdog’s power. He’s just against the House Republicans’ timing. He doesn’t deserve any credit for pressuring them to change their minds, because he’s ultimately going to want them to change them right back once he thinks we’re all distracted enough to get away with it.

Fuck him in other, less erudite, words.

Follow James on Twitter @JamboSchlarmbo.



About James Schlarmann 1481 Articles
James is the founding contributor and editor-in-chief of The Political Garbage Chute, a political satire and commentary site, which can be found on Facebook as well. You definitely should not give that much a shit about his opinions.
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