Right-Wing Butt Hurt Alert: Georgia Governor Decides to Veto Anti-LGBT Bill

Oh boy, the right-wingers are going to be foamy-mouth pissed at the evil, godless heathen liberals of Hollywood when word spreads among them that Georgia Governor Nathan Deal is caving to pressure from Disney and others, and will veto the sweeping anti-LGBT bill that his state legislature handed off to him last week.

Disney had been one of several media companies who joined several other corporations from other business sectors in threatening to boycott the state if their controversial bill was signed by Deal. The bill would essentially give Georgians the right to discriminate against LGBT people as long as the discrimination was religiously based. Deal vetoed the bill calling it redundant since the First Amendment already covers suing churches.


The moral legislators in this country will decry this. They will say that outside forces have stepped in and subverted the will of the people in Georgia. To that I say — tough titty. This isn’t the federal government cracking down on a state’s right to pass a law. It’s a pure and simple demonstration of the power of the free market, actually. Which only compounds the irony of the situation because it will be the rare time that conservatives don’t suggest we defer to the will of the almighty invisible hand of the free market.

What Disney and others did is apply the power of the boycott in a way that religious and social conservatives won’t like. Granted, they just love boycotting stores that have the gall to ask people to leave their firearms outside their walls. They hold massive “Yay Bigotry” days for Chik-Fil-A and use the power of commerce to send a send a message. But oh boy, if you dare to use a boycott to further a progressive idea — then you are clearly an un-American freedom hater.

They’re going to hoot and holler and claim this means God’s wrath will soon be upon us. Don’t be surprised when televangelists and pastors of mega-tax shelters — excuse me, churches — start banging pots and pans in the streets about this. The bathroom is the new abortion clinic, and just like it makes no sense for people in favor of no government intrusion to insert government into the uterine cavities of every woman in the country, it’s similarly incongruous with their professed love of small government to have an opinion on where people poop and pee.

But hey, maybe I’m overreacting. Maybe I’m the one making broad generalizations about people, and maybe I need to just chill out. Because, hey, it’s 2016, and surely even religious conservatives get that LGBT people are just like you and me and they deserve a life free of unfair scrutiny and discrimination. Oh look, here’ s a comment from noted mega-church preacher Josh Feuerstein. You might remember him as the asshole who started all the poutrage over Starbucks’ holiday cups last year.

He left this comment on Governor Deal’s Facebook page. Let’s see how calm and rational he’s being about a very pragmatic decision Deal made to protect his state’s economy, shall we?

BigotedPastorFuck

Yeah, I was right all along. And this will just be the bigoted tip on the derpy iceberg, believe me. Only in America would people who have a proto-sexual relationship with the idea of small government be telling us we need a government so large it can monitor every single time someone micturates in our fair cities, further proving we are living in satirical times. Up is down, down is up, and government has a duty to peak over the stall wall at you.

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About James Schlarmann 1463 Articles

Comedian, writer, founding contributor of The Political Garbage Chute, holder of zero world records or lifetime achievement awards.

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