A Message from God, Delivered via Reverend Renee Webb

Cima_da_Conegliano,_God_the_FatherLate last night, the Lord spoke to me and asked me to deliver a message to the world. Since all it requires to be a reverend these days is to put the word in front of your name, consider me yours. I am but a humble servant.

My Beloved People,

I am the Lord your God. I don’t usually choose to speak to you via lowly Internet writers, but today is an exception. It has come to my attention that a false prophet by the name of Anne Graham Lotz spewed heinous trash in My name, and millions of years of evolution are not enough to prevent the gullible Religious Right from believing in her bullshit. Did I not warn you of these people? She came to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly she is a ravenous wolf. I said, “Blessed are the meek”, not blessed are the sleek!



It appears Mizz Lotz indulged in too much sacramental wine and decided it was her job to pass judgment upon My people in My name. This is precisely why the Southern Baptists are taught that my Son turned that wine into grape juice. We cannot take chances with them. Loose lips and loose tongues wreak havoc, children. When liquor is combined with loads of tax-free money, it becomes a lethal combination of Corporate Christianity and Self-Righteous Bullying that I find morally reprehensible.

I created each person in My image. EACH AND EVERY PERSON, even Anne. I made them black and white and brown; gay and straight and transgendered; tall and short and thin and large; male and female and intersex; liberal and progressive and independent and, yes, even conservative. They are ALL my children, and I love them equally, even though some of them make it more difficult than others. Anne. Bless her heart.

I thought I made it pretty clear in the New Testament that I was done with revenge. I sent my Son down there and sacrificed Him for your sins. We put the old stuff away. I am all about love now. I do not do floods and destroy cities and turn people into salt. I am beyond that now. I certainly do not send terrorists in airplanes to kill thousands of innocent people just because I am having a bad day. Remember the rainbow? That was my promise, and I keep my promises. It’s a God thing with me, because I’m abiding now, not smiting.

For the record, I have never specified a name brand of religion that I prefer be practiced in My name. Nobody has a trademark directly from Me. None of my words have ever been intended to be used to demean anyone, least of all those who are least able to defend themselves. I, the Lord, do not condone bullying of any of my precious children.

I command of you all, once again: Love your neighbor as you love yourself. Treat others the way you wish to be treated. And for My sake, let ME handle the judgments. That is my job, after all.

And one last message for my LGBTQ children: the rainbows are especially for you. I love you, kids.

Hugs and kisses,

GOD

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About Renee Webb 322 Articles
Renee is a recovering Conservative who lives at the intersection of the Bible Belt and the Hypocrisy Highway.
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