Newt Gingrich Thinks Presidents Have Infinite Powers…When They’re Republicans

You know who’s always been a total fan of the Executive Branch of our government being left to run itself as it sees fit? Newt Gingrich, that’s who. Well, that is as long as you’re a Republican. If you’re a Democrat, then Newt has zero problems trying to hold you in check, even for things like consensual, if not inappropriate sexual relationships. But hey, it’s not like he was literally fucking his current wife on the side while is former wife was battling an illness, right Newt? Right?

Dickinson: The Newt and Callista Affair

Newt Gingrich’s affair with his future third wife Callista Bisek, at the time an aide in the office of Wisconsin Rep. Steve Gunderson, was in full bloom on the eve of the Republican Revolution that propelled Gingrich to become House Speaker, in 1994.

Whoops. Sorry, Newty.

What got me thinking about Gingrich at all was an article I saw on Think Progress about his recent interview on NPR. In it, Gingrich seems to imply that Donald Trump simply cannot be expected to be able to follow established laws governing conflicts of interest and corruption, and that Congress should just go ahead and write new rules, just for Trump.

Per Think Progress, Newt told the NPR host we need a “whole new approach” to ethics rules under President Trump.

“We’ve never seen this kind of wealth in the White House, and so traditional rules don’t work,” Gingrich said during a panel discussion on “The Diane Rehm Show.” “We’re going to have to think up a whole new approach.” (source)

Because, you know, Newt and his fellow conservatives are all about trying new things, right? I mean, isn’t it always conservative Republicans begging us to try new ideas, and not, like, totally demanding we hold fast to 19th century economic models and Dark Ages era social mores? Seems to me that Newt’s being a big, fat, partisan hypocrite and douchebag here, but maybe I’m being too harsh. I mean, it’s not like Gingrich is implying that Trump could just wave his imperious hand and pardon everyone around him, opening the door for Teapot Dome (or Dumb, in this case) level scandal and corruption…

Or, well…

“In the case of the president, he has a broad ability to organize the White House the way he wants to. He also has, frankly, the power of the pardon,” Gingrich said, in comments first covered by Politico. “It’s a totally open power. He could simply say, ‘Look, I want them to be my advisers. I pardon them if anyone finds them to have behaved against the rules. Period.’ Technically, under the Constitution, he has that level of authority.” (source)

So let’s just make sure we have all this squarely in our sights. Newt Gingrich, a Trump adviser, is giving interviews to the media in which he says he’s totally cool with Congress just changing the rules for Trump. Newt Gingrich, the guy who started a presidential witch hunt over a blow job because he said the president had no right to lie about that blowjob, is telling us we should change laws written to protect us from being defrauded and victimized by the president because the president belongs to Newt’s party.

And they wonder liberals mock them when they say stupid shit like this. Just imagine the outrage that flow freely from Newt’s never quiet pie hole if Obama had just asked Congress to change a rule or two for him. Imagine if Hillary had said during the campaign she’d just ask Congress to change the laws so that not only would she never face any more questions of her emails, but she’d just pardon everyone around her for good. He’d be a sputtering, doughy mess, wouldn’t he?

These are the interviews that send chills up my spine. Because Gingrich for his entire career has been a “the president shouldn’t have unlimited powers” guy. Or at least he’s been that way when Democrats were in office. Now though? Now he’s the guy telling us that presidents should just get carte blanche because “freedom” and “billionaire.” What a crock of unmitigated codswallop.

Of course the truly horrific part is that Congress could do exactly what Newt is proposing. The Republicans own both chambers and have a path to putting bills on the president’s desk to sign for the first time in nearly a decade. But, hey, don’t worry fellow liberals. The Democrats are there, and they’ve never shown a willingness to bend over, capitulate, and turn tail in the face of Republican adversity, right? They’ll be just as staunchly bitter and oppose and obstruct like the GOP did with Obama right? So this is all just worrying about our government changing itself right before our eyes to make it even easier for the president to rob us blind for nothing, right?




Right?

Save us, Aliens. Please. Halp.


Follow James on Twitter @JamboSchlarmbo.

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About James Schlarmann 1409 Articles
Comedian, writer, founding contributor of The Political Garbage Chute, holder of zero world records or lifetime achievement awards.
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