That Time Obama Shaved 500 Points Off The Dow And Pushed Gun Confiscation Without Due Process In A Single Week

At this point, I don’t even know why I keep pointing out each time that Donald Trump says or does something that would have gotten Barack Obama impeached, thrown out of office, and if certain congressmen from certain Confederate red states, hanged in a lynching party. It sort of feels like preaching to the converted for the most part, and the people whose hypocrisy I’m notating literally couldn’t care less, because I’m pretty sure they had their principles removed and replaced with Jelly Beans and farts or something.

But, well, let’s go once more into the derpy breach, shall we?

Let’s start with the one that probably drives Republicans and conservatives the most batty — Trump’s upcoming tariff and trade war. After announcing stiff as hell tariffs on steel and aluminum — a decision that Trump reportedly made while angry — the Dow Jones Industrial Average started dropping like a rock. Funnily enough though, the same guy that was bragging about the stock market’s gains last month has grown very quiet about it, instead choosing to tweet about how “easy” to win a trade war with China and other countries will be.

Donald J. Trump on Twitter

When a country (USA) is losing many billions of dollars on trade with virtually every country it does business with, trade wars are good, and easy to win. Example, when we are down $100 billion with a certain country and they get cute, don’t trade anymore-we win big. It’s easy!

Pretty much no economist, left, right, or center, thinks Trump is right about this, and that is why the stock market is taking a beating. Look, I really only care about the stock market because of my 401(k) being tied to it. I don’t make the kind of money to be heavily invested in it, and I don’t see it as some kind of great indicator for the economy’s health one way or another. But people who know more about the economy than I ever will play in the market, and they are running scared right now, and for good reason.

As little as I know about economics, I know some rudimentary basics. Tariffs will drive prices up, period. Companies will pass the costs going up along to the customers, and ultimately, that is really who is going to pay the tariff. And the fact that so many products have steel or aluminum in them mean that Trump basically has knee-capped over 500 points from the Dow against the advice of pretty much everyone except his base…a common but tragically stupid tendency he has.

I will say, that to their credit, a lot of the leading conservative voices have slammed the tarrifs. Some, like Ann Coulter, of course, have stayed in Trump’s corner. But a lot of conservatives have been berating Trump for this move. It’ll be really interesting to see if anything comes of their outrage, and I won’t be holding my breath.

Then there’s the other thing Trump said this week that would have gotten Obama thrown out of office. During his little dog and pony bipartisan meeting on gun legislation, Trump made the baffling comment that he was in favor of taking guns from people accused of crimes and then giving them due process. Usually, conservatives argue that only through due process can you even remotely get away with taking someone’s guns. Trump? He didn’t seem to care, and he said something that a lot of us actually think makes a little sense — holding onto someone’s guns while you figure out if they’re fucking nuts or not.

Even Fucker Carlson had to tell the actual truth on his show recently because of how galling the hypocrisy from the Trump White House is these days. Not that he and I are on the same ideological team, per se, but when you have that douchebag with the permanent “I Sharted” face calling out the right for not losing their mind when Trump does something Obama would have been impeached for, you know the hypocrisy is completely and utterly unavoidable.

Tucker Carlson Turns On Trump: ‘Imagine If Barack Obama Had Said That’

Fox News host Tucker Carlson doesn’t criticize Donald Trump very often, but he did so on Thursday night after the president suggested taking guns away from potentially dangerous people before due process. ” Imagine if Barack Obama had said that,” Carlson said. “Just ignore due process and start confiscating guns.”

But don’t go expecting everyone on the right to start calling Trump out for this. They won’t need to, because the NRA already pulled their $30 million dog’s chain, hard. Chris Cox, the NRA’s top lobbyist, met with Trump and Pence last night. He had this to tweet about his meeting:

Chris Cox on Twitter

I had a great meeting tonight with @realDonaldTrump & @VP. We all want safe schools, mental health reform and to keep guns away from dangerous people. POTUS & VPOTUS support the Second Amendment, support strong due process and don’t want gun control. #NRA #MAGA

“Don’t want gun control.” The NRA is literally speaking for the president and his administration. And everything is back to its blood-soaked normal routine. Oh well, back to watching out the window for the giant meteor to finally end all our pain once and for all.

Stay down out there folks, it’s getting beyond ridiculous out there.




About James Schlarmann 1479 Articles
Comedian, writer, founding contributor of The Political Garbage Chute, holder of zero world records or lifetime achievement awards.
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