Ted Cruz Facts

A lot has been said about Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz, his voting record, his Cuban heritage, his Canadian birth, and his fellow Republicans’ animosity toward him. Nevertheless, there are still lots of little-known tidbits about the junior senator from Texas.

Here are some of the more interesting things you may not know about Cruz.

  • Before he changed it to Ted, his childhood nickname was Narc.
  • At birth, his smirk measured five inches long.
  • Growing up in Houston, he had a poster of Milton Friedman on his wall.
  • In middle school, he started a professional association of hall monitors.
  • He once tried to impress a date by reciting, by memory, from the Federalist Papers.
  • High school classmates voted him Most Punchable Face.Lady-Elaine-Fairchilde
  • He once served as curator of the Museum-Go-Round.
  • His uncle worked as a janitor at the Havana nightclub where Fredo Corleone took his brother Michael to see a sex show in The Godfather 2.
  • During a summer break from college, he worked in pro wrestling as a manager named Sir Harvard Havana.
  • His preferred social media platforms are Google Plus and LinkedIn.


  • He occasionally gets in touch with his feminine side by sitting down to pee.Robert-Tilton
  • Sometimes he stays up all night binge-watching Robert Tilton reruns.
  • He’s known to laugh hysterically at TruTV’s Impractical Jokers.
  • He prefers Hunt’s ketchup over Heinz.
  • Frequently he tells himself, “They’re not booing me. They’re saying ‘Cruuuuuuuuz.'”

 


Republished from The Red Shtick.

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About Jeremy White 49 Articles
Jeremy White is an engineer by education, but a smartass by birth, who refused to let his technical background stand in the way of his dream of making fun of people. He's the founder and publisher of the satirical and irreverent humor site TheRedShtick.com
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