The Republicans Just Went Nuclear. Progressives Need To Be The Fallout.

We can officially add “Supreme Court nomination” to “rock & roll, the blues, jazz, and hip hop” on the list of shit white Americans have taken from black people.

When all is said and done, after all the arguments are made, the end result of today’s proceedings on the Senate floor couldn’t be any simpler. Senate Republicans changed long-standing rules and precedent to ram a plagiarist onto the Supreme Court bench. The GOP has gone nuclear, as they promised they would. And now, it’s time to give the GOP a healthy reminder of what always, always comes after a nuclear blast.

Fallout.

Liberals have to be the fallout. We have to hold these mendacious assholes accountable. They may be able to convince their constituents to sleep at night by ignoring how Merrick Garland was treated in pursuit of the true American ideals of “lower taxes for the wealthy,” but that argument cannot win the rest of us. The millions of us who voted for Obama, twice, knowing that the Constitution doesn’t have an “except in election years” clause for Supreme Court nominations, need to punish these glib, feckless, pseudo-patriotic, pedantic fuckwits at the ballot boxes, but we also need to do much more than that, because elections only come every so often.

The left needs to become an incessant, non-stop machine of dissent and civil, lawful resistance. Just hours after Trump was sworn-in, the country and indeed the entire world (all seven continents) held the largest days of protest ever. Millions of women, and their male supporters, took to the streets, to show their displeasure and anger. It’s time to make that kind of thing happen every single weekend. It’d be great if it happened every single day, but every week there should be massive protests.

Mitch McConnell shouldn’t feel free to walk around in public without the truth about how Americans feel about his lies and obstruction of Garland’s nomination screamed in his ugly, tortoise-ish face. Please don’t take that as advocating doing something physical to the wet-eyed, turtle-faced fuck. But I’d say standing outside any building he’s in with a bullhorn and shouting, “SHAME!” into it would be a good start.

Do anything you can. Call. Write. Email. Tweet. Whatever you do — do something.

Register your outrage. Register your anger. Make your elected official know, make every elected official know, that we’re not all partisan-blind Republicans. We can see what happened, and we can tell that McConnell is completely unconnected to anything remotely resembling a principle. The time has come, fellow libtards, to cry “Havoc!’ and let slip the dogs of democratic grousing.

Angry calls to congressional offices got the first disastrous attempt to repeal Obamacare thwarted. That can happen again. It may be tiresome to have to repeatedly fight the same fights, but that’s how it works. That’s how conservatives win. They take a defeat on something like Roe and then spend forty years chipping away at it, biding their time. Liberals have to be win this shit for the long haul.

If liberals are going to be the fallout from this nuclear blast, it will take being willing to become, to some extent, a bit like the Tea Party was for the last decade or so. No, I’m not suggesting you reject climate science, or start believing that tax cuts for the rich do anything other than give rich people more money. I’m saying we have to give fucks again. We have to give so many fucks, in fact, that we become a vociferous, angry cloud of nuclear radiation that follows McConnell and crew everywhere they go.




You want to help? Protest. Seriously; just protest.

The right has made fun of hippies and the counterculture movement for so long that it’s easy to believe that they didn’t accomplish anything. That’s utter bullshit. Try stopping a war sometime. Try marching for racial equality in the south at a time where physical violence against you wasn’t just tolerated, it was damn near encouraged by authorities. Protest works. That’s why the right hates it so much. Because we have and will always do it much better than they can.

Being on the right side of history tends to make your arguments a bit more righteous. It tends to help convince larger groups of people to work together for a common good. Make no mistake, we will have Neil “Can I Copy Off You In Homeroom?” Gorsuch on the Supreme Court bench. The nuclear warhead was detonated. But we can make the Republicans pay dearly.

We cannot go more than a day or two without reminding McConnell of the grave mistake he just made. Of course, the down side is that we have to, like, vote and shit. Even in mid-terms. Which I know, is hard, you know putting effort into caring about humanity and all, but protest without action is meaningless. We can’t afford to get fatigued in this uphill slog.

Protest without commitment in the form of real, honest to God votes, will be fruitless. If the left can do it, if they can at least become as politically motivated as the Tea Party was during the Obama years, we can weather the Trumpnado and come out on the other side. We have to try.

They call us snowflakes. It’s time for a blizzard. It’s time for nuclear winter.


Follow James on Twitter @JamboSchlarmbo.

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About James Schlarmann 1311 Articles
Comedian, writer, founding contributor of The Political Garbage Chute, holder of zero world records or lifetime achievement awards.
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