Wait…Donald Trump’s Teleprompters Don’t Come With Policies?

Treasonous Donald Trump was baffled when Pence broke the news that his teleprompter didn’t come equipped with built-in Presidential Policy Proposals. He’s spent the last year literally screaming random nonsense into a microphone and tweeting fourth-grade schoolyard taunts, and suddenly everyone expects him to know details like what state Kaine is from and that Reagan’s attempted assassin was John Hinckley, Jr., that our biggest terrorist attack was on 9/11 and that Scotland voted to stay IN the EU. What the hell people? UNFAIR!

Now they expect Trump to have coherent ideas for how to fix all these problems he keeps rambling about? Oh shit! Where are all those best people to come up with the bigliest and bestest ideas to Make America Great Again?

Positions

Here are the seven positions listed on his website. I will summarize them. (You’re welcome.)

  1. Pay for the wall: Western Union and companies like it cannot allow aliens to transfer money unless they prove they are in the US legally. Mexico will protest the cut-off of this “welfare”. Cancel visas and charge visa fees. Wow. Just wow. 
  2. Healthcare: Repeal Obamacare. Allow insurance companies to sell across state lines, individuals to deduct premiums from taxes, HSAs, price transparency, allow overseas drugs, get rid of immigrants. FYI – most premiums are already paid pre-tax. We have HSAs. Most experts agree the intrastate sale of insurance policies is not going to make much of a difference. 
  3. US-China Trade Reform: Bring China to the negotiating table, force them to uphold intellectual property laws, end their lax labor standards, lower the US corporate tax rate, and expand the US military presence. I love a good meeting surrounded by men with Uzis. Don’t you?
  4. VA Reform: Let them go wherever Medicare is accepted, fire incompetent people, and make the VA great again. Wheeeee!
  5. Tax Reform: Simplify it and get rid of the death tax. This is basically going to help the rich. 
  6. Second Amendment Rights: Fix mental health and give more people guns. The NRA was the ghost-writer for this one, except I think it was an intern…in junior high school.
  7. Immigration Reform: Build a wall, deport illegals, end birth-right citizenship, end welfare abuse. Barely a re-write of point number one.



None of these went very in-depth, which shouldn’t be a surprise. In fact, I’m impressed there was much more than this on Trump’s site. But for the sake of comparison, here is a list of the issues covered on Hillary Clinton’s website.

  1. A fair tax system
  2. addiction and substance use
  3. economy
  4. Alzheimer’s
  5. autism
  6. campaign finance reform
  7. campus assault
  8. climate change
  9. combating terrorism
  10. criminal justice reform
  11. disability rights
  12. early childhood education
  13. fixing America’s infrastructure
  14. gun violence prevention
  15. healthcare
  16. HIV & AIDS
  17. immigration reform
  18. jobs and wages
  19. K-12 education
  20. labor & workers’ rights
  21. LGBT equality
  22. making college debt-free
  23. manufacturing
  24. military and defense
  25. national security
  26. paid medical and family leave
  27. protecting animals and wildlife
  28. racial justice
  29. rural communities
  30. small business
  31. social security & medicare
  32. technology and innovation
  33. veterans and families
  34. voting rights
  35. wall street reform
  36. women’s rights
  37. workforce skills

This makes me wonder. Has anyone bothered to read any of this? Or do they just hear “White Power” and “Law and Order” and get a yuuuuuge fascism boner for Trump?

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About Renee Webb 322 Articles
Renee is a recovering Conservative who lives at the intersection of the Bible Belt and the Hypocrisy Highway.
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